in need of your assistance

Partly because of this:

ceiling rose

and partly because of this:

splotch painting

but mostly on account of the daily sight of this


and this


and this


I am increasingly desperate for our bedroom (the master bedroom as it would be labelled if we were to have an open inspection) to be painted. I’m sure you can see the problem. And if you can’t, well, I really don’t mean to be rude, but your taste is in your arse, because that paintjob is shit.

Four years we’ve been living here and facing, as I have, the sight of that faux-Michelangelo, I think we should all be thankful that I have retained my good humour to the extent to that I have.

For a range of reasons, many of which will be obvious to the casual observer of our lives, and some of which will not, neither the mister nor I have got around to painting the room ourselves. Nor are we likely to in the foreseeable future. This is not laziness as other unfinished jobs or the unreplaced blown lightglobes are. We both like painting and have done a great deal of it in our lives. Let’s just label it the vicissitudes of life, shall we?

Anyhoo, I have made a momentous decision, and decided that we shall pay someone to do the painting for us. I have obtained a quote of around $1,600.

I know that I should obtain another quote or two, but between you and me and the internet, I couldn’t be fucked. It’s not obtaining the quote that’s the problem so much as the follow up phone calls and the ducking and weaving out of the way of the person or persons whose quote one has rejected.

So, I thought I’d ask you. Does $1,600 sound like a reasonable figure? It’s a largish room, and the quote includes the paint as well as the time to do some minor repairs to the ceiling. It is about $500 more than I was anticipating (and I thought I was being generous), but then, I still think that you can buy a coffee for $1.50 and a bush biscuit for five cents.

0 thoughts on “in need of your assistance”

  1. It’s a bit more expensive because of all the ornate bits, which would make the guts of any any quoting painter sink into their boots. I think it’s a reasonable amount to deal with all the fiddliness. I quake at the thought of plain iron railings!

  2. Ok, I just asked my mister and showed him the pics. Because between you and me and the internet, he is a painter and decorator. He said that it could well come to that figure, depending on the amount of preparation needed (and if you mentioned repairs to the ceiling I’m guessing that there is a bit of prep needed elsewhere too, some of those cornices look a bit bumpy). It also depends on how much woodwork is in the room (window frames, door frames, door, skirtings etc), and ALSO, how many colours you are using. You’ll be needing at least two kinds of paint obviously, one for the walls, and one for the woodwork, but if you are selecting a different colour for the cornices and rose, or even two or more colours (please tell me you’re not), then that all adds up.

    If you want more info feel free to email me. I also type up all his quotes so naturally am an EXPERT myself.

    (That faux marbling effect in the cornice trough is quite something, eh?)

  3. Oh and I just saw duck’s comment and thought I’d add that some painters get interested at the fiddly bits rather than quaking!

    More meaty than just rolling another wall in Dulux Antique White.

  4. Well, I think we have demonstrated that blogging well and truly rocks.

    I shall ring the man in the morning and accept the fee for his services. He was a nice man, which matters very much to me when choosing the person who will be in my house for several hours, so if he’s charging the right amount then that’s a bonus. Though in truth, I am of a similar mind to bb and wasn’t too fussed if he was ripping me off.

    Suse, it will be just the one colour. A shade of white. I am currently incapable of making all but the simplest of decisions (remember the toothbrush?), and honestly, after four years of sleeping under that ceiling, I can’t face anything but some shade of white. I think if we just have one shade, he’s going to spray the ceiling – either the undercoat or the top coat, I can’t remember which.

    I can’t tell you how pleased how I am with this outcome! Tell your mister thanks so much from me, suse. Now, I am off to watch more West Wing.

  5. You’re welcome.

    Our old house was full of fancy roses and cornices and I miss it. All in white will be lovely and refreshing and clean. (Although a soft donkey grey would be nice on the rose … sorry.)

    And yes to the bit about picking your tradesman by imagining them in your house for several days with you. I’m sure B gets half his clients that way cos he’s gentle and personable. The older couple he’s working for at the moment sit down with him at lunchtime and they all do the crossword together. And then they give him a camellia bloom with its stem wrapped in foil to bring home to me.

  6. Un-faux-gettable.

    I would also like to thank Suse for the expression “cornice trough” which I am going to try and use in a sentence tomorrow.

  7. We also have some fiddly ugly cornice work that makes us wonder if there was ever any brothel-work going on here ( royal red and gold – noice ! ).

    And probably for the same reasons, we just can’t be farqued thinking it through .. and doing however bloody many coats to hide the gaudy red .. plus, of course, all the prep work and repairs.

    Le Sigh.

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